10 Giant Steps to a Simpler Life

10 Giant Steps to a Simpler Life

-Get the book, Your Money or Your Life. Read it, and you have made the best possible start on your way to a simpler, more satisfying life.
-Make this old New England proverb your motto: "Use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without." As a wartime slogan, it helped Americans win World War II.

-Try consuming or using half as much of as many things as you can. Start with shampoo, detergent and toothpaste, then get creative and see how many others you can come up with. Half as much is sometimes twice as good (eating, for example), and always twice as thrifty.

-Things you never need to buy again: freezer bags (use the plastic bags inside cereal boxes), things you can get for free or free alternatives, such as matches, paper towels, calendars, note paper, drawing paper for the kids, padded envelopes, bottled water...think of others, and put them on your list of "never-buy-agains."

-Sell your TV and use the time you free up (49 hours a week for the average American!) for frugal endeavors.

-Move somewhere with a lower cost of living. The highest and lowest-cost areas vary by 95%, but salaries for most jobs rarely fluctuate more than 25%. Example: moving from Los Angeles to Atlanta would result in a 50% drop in the cost of living with about 13% drop in earnings.

-Barter for goods and services. See if there is an organized system for this in your area.

-If you haven't already got them, consider not having your own children. Not reproducing is the best way to dramatically reduce your consumption, expenses and personal impact on the planet's resources.

-Complete all nine steps from Your Money or Your Life. Do them all, in order, and you will almost certainly be guaranteed success in adopting a simpler—and more fulfilling--lifestyle.

-Share your resources and results with people you care about, and multiply the good effects on the planet that will come from your new way of living.

Next blog I will ask you to become a full feldged member of my cult. Boo ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Girls in the Toilet

An account of bathroom behavior at my place of employment:

1. Girl talking on cell phone in handicapped stall, shushing person on the the other end of the line whispering "hold on, someone just walked in."

2. Girl setting out on the counter one paper towel, one container dental floss, one travel size toothpaste, one toothbrush and a breath mint. Not sugar free.

3. Girl coming out of bathroom stall pants not pulled all the way up

4. Girl waiting until someone washes their hands before she pees

5. Girl washing hands, wiping down counter, using towel to open door

6. Girl farting and then clearing her throat as if to cover it up

7. Notice on bathroom mirror: If you mess up the toilet seat, please have the courtesy to clean it.

8. There are five stalls in the bathroom. I am using the second one. There is no one else is the room. The next person that comes in, uses the stall directly next to mine.

9. Girl with shirt off, washing said shirt in the sink

10. Girl coming out of bathroom with two rolls of toilet paper.

Odd behavior indeed.



Do guys ever see these things

Take Your Private and Shove It Up Your Arse!

No, I am not Scottish, for some reason I thought I may offend by putting the word "Ass" in my subject line. But we're in the blog now baby, so fuck all that nicey, nicey crap.

Listen, I blog tonight for one reason and one reason only. To tell you how frickin' tired I am of the whole "Private Profile" thing. For the love of (insert random celebrity name here) just let me see your darn profile without having to be your friend. DON'T YOU KNOW I AM TRYING TO STALK YOU? Or at least steal all your really good one liner's and poetry.

Be open, be free, allow the world into your happy, little place.

10 Things

10 random facts/habits/ whatever about Jayne:

1) Despite being an overbearing, loudmouth know-it-all, educated, professional woman, I am, in actuality very old fashioned. I believe in family, taking care of my husband and children and would be extremely happy being Holly Homemaker.

2) Girly things make me happy. Make-up, shoes, clothes, pretty hair, the whole she-bang.

3) I was the only girl in my neighborhood growing up. This led to my ability to capture snakes, scorpions and lizards. Decidedly un-girly. My mother also refused to buy me a dirt bike which led to jumping a wide handled-banana seat bike off ramps and broken bones.

4) Major life events and exciting things for me take place on the 1st of the month. I was born on the 1st, married on the 1st, conceived my first child on the 1st, will most likely die on the 1st.

5) I am addicted to lip stuff. Chapstick, lipgoss, lipstick. You will never see me without some type of shimmery lip. It almost goes beyond addiction and into obsession.

6) No matter what my monetary situation, I get a pedicure once a week. I also bite my nails, which means I have to get fake ones every two weeks.

7) I own more than 75 workout tapes, a Total Gym, a treadmill, multiple hand weights, yoga mat, stability ball and tension bands, TIVO Fit channel shows, yet I eat fast food everyday.

8) I love the changing of the seasons. The first days of spring, when the air smells fresh, the first warm days of summer by the pool, the first cool days of fall, crisp air and color changes, the first days of winter and the first snowfall. I reflect with each season change and get a sense of purpose.

9) Reno, Nevada will always be the most perfect place in the world to be.

10) I am very empathetic but not sympathetic.

Pooka

In my family we have what it known as The Pooka. The Pooka is the someone or something that is responsible for the missing sock from your laundry, the car keys you can't find and the ominous glare of a roll of cardboard staring at you where once was toilet paper a moment ago. Scratch that last one, that's my husband's doing. What I am essentially getting at here, is that The Pooka seems to have taken a particular interest in me lately.

First, you should know that I am addicted to lip-gloss. All kinds, all flavors. I have Lip Smackers, Chapsticks, Blistexs, in flavors you probably you didn't even know existed. I am also constantly applying said items, so much so that people will ask to borrow my "lipstuff" without even asking if I have any first. It is an automatic that I will have some and can probably offer up six options. Knowing that, I will move on to my dilemma with The Pooka.

I did a round up of lipstuff today from my car, my purses, from my munchkins toy box and it seems that I am missing the lid/cap to 3 out of 4. This is quite aggravating as it is very un-hygienic to have lipstuff exposed to the elements. Little bits of everything stuck to my glorious shiny stuff. I will not toss it though. I have carefully cleaned all open containers and put them in individual baggies. I am a fiend.

What I would like to know is this. WHY is The Pooks stealing my caps/lids? WHAT are they being used for? Why not take the whole damn thing? Evil, sinister Pooka. Oh, the horror, oh the torture. Pooka is rubbing its hands together and cackling. One day all those caps/lids will show up at once covering the planet blocking out sunlight killing all living things. My addiction will be the demise of the human race.

Of course, it could just be my daughter taking them and hiding them. I guess we'll never know.

Happy Birthday to Me!

Holy Cow, when did I get so old? You know you are starting to get old and nostalgic when you begin planning birthday parties that revolve around things you did as a kid. This year it is roller skating. I have fond memories of skating to Madonna's "Crazy for You" with my adolecesnt crush of the moment. Sigh, good times.

Ok, so this is my first "Blog". What the heck is the dealio with these things? It's like legal crack. People are addicted. Apparently, we all have something to say and feel that there is nothing like a public forum to rant, rave and otherwise complain about whatever topic is pressing. I think I will dedicate my first blog to...drum roll please.......greeting cards.

Since it is my birthday, I have received birthday cards from Mom, Grandma, Mom-in-law, Husband etc.etc. My two year old even gave me a birthday card this morning, which was really cute except for her signature looked an awful lot like my husbands handwriting. I was thinking this morning that if I had a dollar for every birthday, Valentine's Easter, Christmas card I got, I would have a lot of money. I receive about 60-100 cards a year. I have decided from this moment on, I am going to send a piece of notebook paper with $2.50 and a short greeting. Like....Oh...."Happy Birthday" or let's go out on a limb here and say "Merry Christmas". Why do we need Hallmark to compose sweet bits of prose, when we really don't mean what THEY say the first place.


Let's contribute to people's pocketbooks instead of their emotional well being. Send cash not cards!



Have a great day!

Truth Fact

I am not a psychologist, a therapist, or medical professional. Opinions and advice are solely based on my very own awesome personal opinion with absolutely no data to back it up whatsoever. My opinion may change without notice and I may contradict myself on many occasions. Please do not bring this to my attention. Get over it and continue to enjoy the randomness. It's my gift to you. Cherish it.